”“Megan, I'm not an idiot. I know.”She blinked. “You do?”“This is about the gardener boy. I know he's gone. If you want to follow him, I won't stand in your way. You're both young. I assumed someone would come along...”“Oh! No, nothing like that.”Now Peter blinked. His voice took on an edge of uncertainty. “So you're not...leaving?”Megan took his hand, squeezing his large fingers and kissing the backs of his knuckles, never mind the smell of ink. “Certainly not.”Some color came back into Peter's face. “Ah. Well. I'm pleased.”“But I'm terribly worried about the children. I think it would be better if we moved them back to the city.”“Why?”“This place isn't good for them. And there's something that I...” Her voice quavered. “Peter, if I told you everything you would call me mad, but I'm frightened. There are terrible things here, and I think Flora and Miles are in danger every second. I can't say anything else, but I couldn't keep quiet about it either.” She hung her head a bit. Peter. I was daydreaming about him, about how we'd be such an amazing couple, or how safe I'd feel engulfed in his arms under the covers; about how his lips could make everything around me disappear as he'd press them against mine. You see, having this wake-up slap back then felt like a train hit me. I mean, I was feeling all these things towards my cousin, who lives thousands of miles away. And he's my cousin. For a moment I felt so small and so wrong, even sick for thinking these things. For a moment. After that moment, my nipples got hard as I started thinking of his touch. I just let that desire flow right through me.I started giving more and more attention to the way I looked before having a Skype call with my dear cousin. The whole pre-Chatroulette routine turned into pre-Skype routine. I'd doll up and send him a message saying "I'm here if you wanna call" hoping he'd be around and actually call. If he wouldn't, I could've always turned to Chatroulette for my daily validation, since I.
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